I'm one of those people who finds that you can always learn something from the past. No matter what type of experience it is. A trip, a relationship, a friend, a class, hell even a movie.   No matter what type of situation or event occurs, you can always pull something positive from it.  Which is why  think I always did well in history classes. Because if you dont learn from the past, you're going to be doomed to repeat it.  

And I know that as cliché as that statement is, its true.  Example: you were in a relationship that ended because of communication problems. So  some people would look at that as a waste of time.  I see that you can still take away something positive from a horrible situation.  Communication problems, find what exactly was wrong on your part, and learn about it. Improve from it.  At least, thats my outlook on the issue.

A lot has happened to me this year. A lot of bad shit.  At one point during the worst of it, back around march, a family member who was very sad about the issue turned to me and asked me why I was so nonchalant about it. And I asked them why I should waste time being worried or being sad about something when I can spend that same energy I'd be wasting into doing something productive.

Instead of wasting time being sad about the fact that I didnt have any friends anymore, I decided to look at the friends I did still have and why they stuck by me. Then, once I'd found out why those people stuck by me, I realized numerous things about myself, and the way I treated people in general.  Since that realization, I think I've grown a lot as a person, but thats not what this is about right now. That's for a later topic.  

So, what inspired this is partially is half a history channel commercial saying how we've come so far from learning from the past, and half a shit-load of depressing myspace bulletins filling up my home page.  I guess what I'm getting at is:

Think of how much you can actually work on yourself if you take the energy you're using to be sad, and actually focus on the things you can fix, or make better.  

or if you need it said i another way;  

Dont waste time on things you cant change. I know sounds cruel, but think about it. If a girl you really like is deciding between you and another guy, you know what? Its not your choice. Present your case, be yourself, make her smile all you want. But in the end, its her choice.  So dont waste time worrying about what shes going to do. Its not in your hands. So use the time you're spending productively, it can really turn your whole outlook on life around.  Or maybe, thats just me, ya know?

Oh well. Thats that.  Thanks for reading. 

Current Location: rm 101
My mind is: reflective
Drowning in: Billy Joel

Life's ok.
I'm surviving.
Only 3 and 1/2 months.
shit,
Accepted into CSUN,
dont know about the other 3.
Catching up with friends is fun.

~I'm still here

"Looking for something ive never seen
Alone and im in between
The place that im from and
The place that im in
A city ive never been"
-Trust Me, by the Fray

My mind is: complacent
Drowning in: Let Love In - Goo Goo Dolls

Pay attention now, kids, this is important.

Valentine's Day as a commercial holiday is simply full of shite. It's loud, it's obnoxious and it's plenty overrated and over hyped. Frankly, I have no idea who St Valentine was, or which one of his enemy's hearts he ripped out in order to get a holiday named after him, but that doesn't really matter at this point. At the core of it, the intention of St Valentine's, to me, was something very simple.

It's an excuse.

You know how selfish we all tend to get, how wrapped up in our own stupidities and ambitions we usually are. There are times, many times, that we simply don't see or appreciate all the good in our lives. Despite all our best intentions, as much as we say it will never happen, we are all guilty of this at one time or another.

How often do you express appreciation to those dear people in your life? How often do you get flowers for your girlfriend? How often do you give yourr mother's a box of chocolates and a card?

Probably not as often as you should.

Well now you have an excuse, that extra little push to do something that you should be constantly doing anyways.

So go ahead and do the overblown gestures of romance and love today, but dont forget to focus on the little ones, the important ones, to the people that matter.

Tell your father how much you respect him, and how you wish that you'll up to possess even half his morality and integrity. Tell your mother that you don't spend time with her because you have to, but because you genuinely want to, and that you consider her one of your closest friends. Tell your brother or sister how proud you are of everything he's accomplished, and that from time to time, s/he actually acts his age. Tell your significant other how she constantly makes you smile and somehow manages to quiet that chaotic piece of real estate you call a mind.

Valentines Day. It's an excuse.

Use it.

Current Location: hom
Drowning in: Mew

I just found out that I"m 10 lbs underwieght.
Thats bad.
I hate my fast metabolism

learned:
+/-life. its not about good or bad, its tough, and thats what sucks.
+i am done with SP
+i still love theatre
+i love vtv
+i care too much.
+i don't like being thought of as a horrible person
+i'm too hard on myself.
+not being happy is okay, but i don't like it.
+happiness is dependent on whether or not you accept your life for what it is.

long version: i held onto things too much this year. last year i was content. this year  i delved in further to "truly" discover myself, but ended up repeated the past just to find out that i was me all along, and that is comforting to know. but now i care about some things too much, and i like caring but it's fucking draining. i have to learn how to control that and know when to care. and know that nice doesnt mean get walked over, but i shouldnt be mean.

did/happened:
+fuck drama within drama, i still love most of the people though
+With Their Eyes/Tartuffe were fun to watch
+Twelfth Night was the best summer of my life
+SATs/SAT2s/ACTs suck, but i kicked their asses
+VTV is like my second family
+I miss speech tournys
+Random Jamba runs during school are fun
+State was amazing
+Little Miss Sunshine was the greatest thing ever
+i need people
+i didnt leave the country this year i dont like it.
+school is what i was most afraid of, and it's what im best at.
+new people is fun.
+i dont like letting go of people, but sometimes i have too
+im determined
+ good music.

people:
+me=growing everyday. its something alright, not fun all the time, but alright

in no particular order
+gavin=always there when i need you. youre my best friend
+corky=always makes me have a good time.
+amber=dont talk to much anymore, but i still think youre awesome and we should chill.
+alyssa=know you wont see this, but i love you
+chelsea= nice to have you around girl. <3
+rosa=my mexican gf.  I'm soooooo glad we won cutest couple
+dennis=wont see this, but i'm happy to have you be my president bud
+viv=worth mentioning. you get me through those hellish days/nights/mornings
+lj friends/ohf in particular. iloveyouguys, seriously.
if you want me to write something about you, i will..comment!

2006 was something alright. life is so chaotic and you have to grab at the moments in between.
i can only hope 2007 will take me to new heights.

Tags: new years 06
Current Location: Home
My mind is: restless
Drowning in: Love like winter

Havent updated in a while. Will soon,

Good day.
Homework done early
Calarts apps started
Jamba Juice
Senior Project is done
2 hour nap
Free Lemonade from my girls
Dinner with Pete
Worked on speech.


Once more, a good day.
I'm happy

~Chris


“I'll be the wall that protects you
From the wind and the rain,
From the hurt and pain.”
-All for Love, by Bryan Adams, Sting and Rod Stewart

Current Location: Home
My mind is: content
Drowning in: Oh Mandy - Spinto Band

I honestly wish i could say that relationships arent worth it. But i think they really are. If you genuinely care about someone, and they you, it is worth it. The feeling you get when in love is more amazing than any feeling ive ever felt. But you have to be willing to listen to eachother. That was my problem. And sometimes, break-ups can be insane and make you feel horrible. But i've found that no matter how hard breakups are, in the end, they do make you a better person. And they improve your judgement about relationships. I feel that i made a grevious error with my last relationship, and although i was at fault, it wasnt all my fault. I just wish some people would acknowledge their mistakes like i am mine. In the end, break-ups just bring us one step closer to our true love, whoever that may be. And if you did something wrong, always apologize, even if its not listened to or accepted.

Thats my two-cents for the day.

Peace,
~Chris

Quote of the Day

‘Sat around and thought about destiny
Which led me to feelings I could not conceive
Because I was holding on to yesterday
Had to let go to find today‘
- Politics of Life, by Waking Ashland

So, fright fest is AMAZING. I like my maze. Carnage E. Hall, it is the shit. I lurv it. Rosah was in there yesterday, and Maggie was with me today. My room, the FInal Scare is the best. We scared these three black guys today, and they FREAKED OUT. It was the best. Also, this girl grabbed me and took a pic of me and her and screamed that she'd put it on her space. Also, i got kissed in the maze by a guest. It was tons of fun. I'll see everybody tomorrow.

Peace
~Chris


Quote Of The Day
"‘No matter what anybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world.’
- John Keatings, from Dead Poet’s Society (1989)

Current Location: 27819, Rainier Rd. Castaic, CA, 91384
My mind is: tired
Drowning in: i dont wanna dance ~ Scissor Sisters

On my life,
1: Working Fright Fest. I'm in the Final Room in Carnage E. Hall. Tis amazing. Yes, yes it is.
2: Saw Doubt today, and it was amazing, But i could not stand Sister James.
3: Speaking of Doubt, I'm doing Large Group Drama at DTASC this year. And yes, I'm doing Doubt w/ Maddy and Daisy.
4: Connect To Success is next week, and I'm dreading it.
5: I"m going to earn about $700 working FF. Yay!
6: To clear it up for some people. I have no intention or desire of ever being in a relationship with that person ever again. I'll give you a reason if you ask for it.
7: You're awesome!

:-D

Quote of the Day:

"Talking about the dream
Like the dream is over
Talk like that
Wont get you nowhere
Everybodys trusting in the heart
Like the heart dont lie"
All I Need - Matchbox 20

Tody was ok.
Orientation was fun.
Lost was great.
Fighting w/ parents wasnt.

Doubt tomorrow...whee!

Quote of the Day

‘You're always preaching not to be numb
When that's how you thrive
You pretend to create and observe
When you really detach from feeling alive ’
- Goodbye Love, from Rent